What is it about aiming to get somewhere that gets most people anxious, excited, or nervous? Why do we hesitate, procrastinate like a pro before taking that jump we have been trying to psyche ourselves into taking? And worse yet, what is it that we fear the most? Is it the beginning of the journey, the middle drudge, or the finale of the destination? I guess it all depends on each one of us. For me, it’s usually the finale I dread. The end, the end that may not be dramatic, nor dull. The end that may just mean I have to find something else to do. It’s the moving on – that is what gets me scared of all the stepping stones you have to jump to get to the other side, and then, its done. You have done what you started out to do, and after that, who knows.
Two months ago, I started a journey, with no care in the world at how scary the beginning steps were, nor the big hurdles and quicksand I had to avoid. No, I simply knew it was something I wanted, neigh, I needed to do, to prove not so much to others, but myself that I still had something to offer, something ticking away inside that needed a point to express. What was this journey? It was the wild crazy, impulsive journey of ‘The Circle’ so far, a short suspense/horror film I wrote on an impulsive evening and sought our friends and acquaintances to see if it was something I could interest them into joining me in its making. They joined!
What was next? The organisation, the auditions, the fund-raising campaigns, the efforts to secure dates, location and equipment, the brainstorming and gathering of enough crew, food and water, and schedules. As of 4am Australian time on the 22nd of April, I, along with 7 wonderful actors and over 20 crew members successfully completed shooting The Circle.
What’s next? The editing, sound design, colour-grading and VFX. I’m now past the beginning phase of this journey, this exciting journey I’ve been lucky enough to share with great talents and personalities! Truly feel blessed at the ease of the whole thing. I don’t doubt the next phase will be equally exciting for me as I face it with the same impulsiveness I started the whole project with. I have after all made a promise, a promise to my fellow cast and crew, and the supporters on Pozible that I will do all in my power to give them their time in a Premiere. It’s scary, taking this huge responsibility. Do I know what I’m doing? Some. Some however, I’ll have to learn as I go.
With all due respect, I am however not looking forward to the end of this journey, where I’ll be saying thank you and farewell and best wishes to all who have been a part of this journey, either walking besides me through this whole thing, or supporting me when it called for. This journey will end. That’s for sure. Cast and crew will move on to bigger and better things, of which I’m sure. The film itself will run its course as best it can. What about me? Now that’s a very good question. I wish I could answer it. I’m there from the beginning to the end, and perhaps beyond, as this is a project that will always be special to me. It’s a story, and my stories have always held a very special place within my heart, but truly, what next?
For now, I’m simply trying not to think about it. Sounds silly, but I guess I believe whatever will happen is meant to happen. For now, I can do the best I can. My one and biggest hope for this project is that it will benefit positively towards every single one of the cast and every single crew members who have made this impulsive dream a reality so far.
(Photo courtesy of: Eilannin Dhu – Cast member) The Circle’s Cast
(Crew not pictured – yet)
To you all, my heartiest thank you and well wishes. All the best for your own journeys ahead as I now try and bring this to it’s finale.